A few days ago, I woke up to the harsh realization that leaving Impact Wrestling meant I couldn't take my kids to Universal Studios any time I pleased anymore. No Mummy or Simpsons without waiting, no post pre-tape rides on the Hulk-coaster. A few days from now, I will come face to face with an even harsher reality; for the first time in several years, there will be no paycheck awaiting me in the Foley mailbox. So with those two realities coinciding, I think it's only fair that I've been asking myself whether working for TNA (Impact Wrestling) was really all that bad.
The answer I keep coming to is "no" - it really wasn't all that bad. In fact, it was pretty good. Sometimes it was really good. I was treated treated with respect, paid well, and pretty much liked everyone I worked with... including Russo, Hogan and Bischoff, in case you were wondering.
I think it's always a good idea to try see problems from other people's points of view. I mentioned on Twitter a few days ago that I pushed hard for changes I thought would be beneficial to Impact, and as a result, was thought to be "difficult to work with." You know, after a few days of serious thinking, I can really see how that "difficult" label could indeed apply to me. I was incredibly critical of the company on Jeff Katz's "Geek Week" last November, did an interview with the opposition to support my book, forgot to mention the company I worked for on several interviews, took part in a handful of interviews that I was asked politely not to by the company that employed me, and lastly, sent out a fairly immature and hurtful tweet comparing my Empty Arena match with the Rock in 1999 to Impact house shows - in terms of attendance. If not for Congessman Weiner's boner shot, my "empty arena" crack may have been the most ill-thought and costly tweet of the month.
I also mentioned my "request" to be released from my contract. Actually, it began as an a legitimate offer to Terry Taylor to help trim the Impact roster of some expensive fat. I had some genuine differences creatively with Impact, and honestly didn't think the company should have to continue to pay good money to someone who had lost faith ion the product. At the time, it seemed like a pretty fair offer. But at the point we agreed to forge ahead with me as the Network rep, I should have just shut up and done the best I could in the role, at least until the Destination X show was over - at which point my departure could have become an interesting part of the show. I regret that an initial offer made in the company's best interest became a request and maybe even a demand in my own self-interest - or at least what i thought was my own self-interest.. until I realized I didn't get to go to Universal or to the mailbox anymore.
Somehow, during the exit process, I forgot the central theme of the Rally to Restore Sanity (and/or fear) - that people could disagree without being disagreeable. I think I did become disagreeable there for a few days, and ultimately, the manner in which I departed was not good for anybody involved - me, TNA, the wrestlers, or the fans. I am especially sorry that some of the things I did or said hurt Dixie Carter personally. While some of the criticisms leveled at TNA/Impact by me or others are valid, I think it's been very helpful for me to step back and visualize the landscape of the wrestling business without the faith and vision of that one specific person. Because, make no mistake about it, without Dixie's leap of faith several years ago, Impact does not exist. 100's of incredibly talented wrestlers wrestlers would not have had the chance to show what they could do on a national stage. Dozens of others, myself included, would not have been able to enjoy second chances, last chances, or have the luxury or making choices, had Dixie chosen not to invest her time, passion and money into the complicated, frustrating world of pro-wrestling/sports entertainment. For me, personally, the opportunity at TNA/Impact afforded me the chance to enjoy almost three great years with my family, while being able to explore other passions, like my work with RAINN - even while my passion for wrestling was fading.
Far too often, I was guilty of looking at the Impact glass half-empty - wishing the show and the company could be what I thought it should be, instead of seeing it half-full and appreciating TNA/Impact for what it was - a very good place to work, full of good people, who treated me and my family very well.
